Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Tongue In Face, Part 8

Here's part eight, in all its glory.

___

Step Eight: Bang Your Head Against the Wall

After all the advice I’ve given, it may still be difficult for you to come up with ideas. Fear not, for I am about to reveal a secret known to real writers everywhere, one they’ve tried to keep hidden from the public for centuries. Although it will win me innumerable enemies, I am going to share this bit of creative knowledge with you.

Here goes.

Bang your head against the wall.

I’m not kidding.

See, ideas live inside your brain. Sometimes it gets all sticky up there and you have to jar them loose. Hence: Bang your head against the wall.

Do it three times, fast and hard. Then wait five minutes and write down the first thing that comes to mind. It’ll be pure gold. If nothing comes to mind, repeat the process.

If a wall is unavailable, try another hard object, like the floor (preferably uncarpeted). If you’re out of doors (shame on you!), try a paved surface. Sod is too soft and could lodge the ideas deeper in your brain. If you’re indoors, stay away from breakable surfaces and objects, such as a kitchen cabinet or a teacup. Stick with the walls or the floor. Ideas will be dripping out your ears in no time.

___

Part nine tomorrow.

- TJG

No comments:

Post a Comment